Pretty Little Lies: You do have a favorite…and so do I.

img_0388I was one of the last great believers in Santa Claus, simply because my parents said it was true and I didn’t have the desire to disprove them. Fat old man in red suit brings us the presents you’ve been “hiding” in your room in plain sight, mom? To a half Jewish, half Buddhist family? Great! If I leave my dirty tooth under my pillow, I’ll find money from a full-grown adult fairy who collects them? Fantastic! Those mean kids are “just jealous” and it’s not because I still play with my Barbies in 7th grade and sleep in my mom’s bed? Makes perfect sense!

With this in mind then, you’ll surely understand that when I asked my mom my very favorite question to ask her, and she gave me her very reasonable and fair answer, I absolutely believed her:
“Mommy, who is your favorite?”
“Honey, I don’t have a favorite. I love you all equally!”
Roses and sunshine ensue. Beautifully put, mom! Even though my brother is your only son and your firstborn, and my sister is the baby of the family by nearly 8 years and the one we always called your “miracle”, you are such a dedicated mom that you see that my worth as a middle child is exactly equal to that of my siblings. Huzzah!

I would probably have still believed this 30 years later, and happily so. I bought it after I had my first child, no easy baby by any means, but heaven help the brave and stupid individual who called him anything less than an angel. Continue reading

Pre-K Application: First Draft

We’re still working out some kinks…

1). What method of guidance is used in your home? 

Survival.

2). Please list any behavior issues or unique needs that you feel we should be aware of?

He is three. As in, THREE.

3). Briefly describe your child’s personality?

Mercurial. But cute.

4). Does child cry easily? If yes, what soothes your child?

No. Candy.

5). Are there any particular routines that are helpful at nap or rest time?

Pray. Duck. Cover.

6). Does child have any special fears of which you are aware? Please describe.

Sleep. Rules. Ketchup shortages.

I see public school in our future.